Insecurities
by loveattack2021
Summary: I may not be the most beautiful person in the world; at least I can try to be the best girlfriend to Troy; Even if I know someone who can be better at it than me. TROYPAY.


Sharpay's POV

I entered the school halls with my head looking down. Ever since _she_ came to East High, my world just turned upside down. I used to love my life; I had friends, a loving family, good grades, and a wonderful and loving boyfriend, but now, it feels like all those things are not important.

I open my locker and start to put my books in. I grabbed the ones I'll need for the next coming periods. I sighed when I heard the front doors of East High open, and the students went silent. I leaned on my locker and closed my eyes. I hated the fact that just because she is every guy's dream girl, and every girl's insecurity, people treat her differently.

The worst part is that, it is impossible to hate her. She is not only beautiful, but she's also very smart and sweet, and very talented, too. I inhaled deeply, but before I could exhale, I felt a familiar pair of arms around me.

I turned to see my beloved boyfriend, Troy Bolton. At least he's here.

"Hey, Hun" Troy greeted me with his dashing smile,

"Hi. So how was your morning?" I asked him as I shut my locker close.

"Oh, you know the usual. My dad's making me practice harder; the championships are coming up." He told me as we walked towards our homeroom.

"Oh. Well, I'm sure you'll do great. You always do" I said with a smile, although his smile was a lot bigger.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "Thanks, Hun. And what about you? I heard you were helping Ms. Darbus write a script for the play, Kelsi with her music, and there's a competition coming up for the Decathlon team?"

I chuckled, "Yeah."

"How are they working out so far?" He asked me,

"Ms. Darbus is sticking with Moulin Rouge this time, Kelsi is doing great, and the decathlon team just needs a few more practices in only a few subjects…" I explained and he nodded.

"Seems like my girl is being too busy nowadays, are you sure you'll have time for me? To watch the game?" He asked with his batting eyelashes.

I smiled and stopped walking. I turned to face him and let my fingers brush through his hair, "Of course, I would. What type of girlfriend would I be?"

"You'd be an awesome girlfriend. Which you are; just promise me that even with all the work you're doing, you'll still have time for your man"

I chuckled, "Of course. I could never leave you behind, you know that, Troy." I told him with passion burning in my eyes. I felt him relax and soften up,

"Yeah, I do. Thanks, Pay" He told me before he laced our fingers together and walked to our next class.

--

I and Troy were seated apart. I was seated at the very back, and he was seated at the very front. He was East High's Golden Boy, or sometimes referred to as "East High's King". I sometimes wonder if I deserve him, but when he tells me how much he loves me, I tend to believe him, but after that, when I'm alone, I can't help but doubt.

Then, _she_ entered. She was as graceful as ever, and she always had a smile on her face; unlike me. I was deadly clumsy, and I don't always smile.

She was seated right next to Troy. It pains me to know how she is considered as "East High's Golden Girl", "East High's Queen", or… "Troy's perfect match".

She was better at me in almost everything.

Although, when people started calling her his perfect match, he came to my house and he talked to me about it; He asked if I was okay, and if I'm upset. He's always the gentleman. I couldn't let him down. No one could. So, even if I wanted to cry in front of him, I just fake a smile and tell him everything's alright. I may not be the most beautiful person in the world; at least I can try to be the best girlfriend to Troy; Even if I know someone who can be better at it than me.

Ms. Darbus entered the room, everyone quieted down.

"Okay. Good Morning, students! As you may know, today will be the auditions for the musicale. The play we will be doing will be Moulin Rouge. For those of you, who are interested, do attend to me in the theatre during free period." Ms. Darbus announced,

Some students groaned and some were very interested.

"Ms. Brown, should I expect your presence during free period?" Ms. Darbus asked _her_.

"Of course, Ms. Darbus, I would love to be part of the cast" Tiara said sweetly.

Ms. Darbus sighed with a smile, "Thank you, Ms. Brown." She said to her, "Now, do I have any students who are interested in playing the leading man?" She asked as she turned to the rest of us,

Chad raised his hand, "Ms. Darbus, I think Troy would be delighted to play the leading man to your play".

I saw Troy turn to him and gave him a hard look.

"Mr. Bolton, is this true?" Ms. Darbus asked him with wide eyes.

"No, definitely not, ma'am." He said

"Well, alright." Ms. Darbus said before the bell rang

"Class dismissed."

Everyone started to get up. I looked at Troy, he was talking to her. I couldn't help but eavesdrop.

"Come on, Troy, it'd be fun if you join the play. You should give it a shot" I heard Tiara say

"No thanks, Tiara. I'm a bit caught up with Basketball, maybe the next musical?" He offered.

Tiara giggled, "I'm looking forward to it", and she said before shaking Troy's hand and walked out the room as graceful as a gazelle.

Troy sighed contently, and then smiled hugely. He shook his head slightly before grabbing his books and walking over to me. I pretended to close my book and pretend as if I was reading the whole time.

"Hey, are you ready to go?" He asked me,

I nodded and walked ahead of him. He walked me to my locker and to my next class; for the whole time, it was silent. I didn't want to talk to him. It would only give away the secret I kept from him for such a long time.

--

During lunch time, I sat with my friends and Troy, and his friends. Everyone was talking except for me and Troy, who was watching me with worried eyes.

I did not dare to look at him. He would call me his 'open book'. He said it was so easy to read my mind, or know how I feel through my eyes. I know envy, insecurity, and pain were very evident in my eyes. I could feel it.

I couldn't stand him looking at me with those eyes anymore. I turned my head to Gabriella and tried to start a conversation with her.

"So, Gabriella, do you think I can come to the practice for the competition later?" I asked her

"Of course, you can. You are part of the team too, you know." She said, giving me a soft nudge

"Yeah, I know. Thanks." I thanked her

"No prob." She said as I nodded softly to myself.

I'm glad I have best friends. If I don't, then I'm pretty sure I have nothing, even if Troy was there, simple words could end everything we have together.

I still felt Troy's eyes on me, so I grabbed the music sheet me and Kelsi were working on, and started to write some music.

------

The final bell rang; I grabbed my books and headed to my locker. I placed all my books inside and grabbed the ones I'll need for the meeting. I shut my locker close and saw Troy walking over to me.

"Hey" he greeted,

"Hi" I replied softly,

"Is everything okay? You look a bit… down" He noted for me,

"Ah, no, I'm not. I'm just really stressed," I said half-heartedly

"Oh. Well, why not I take you out tonight. It _is_ a Friday." He offered,

"Uh, I can't tonight. I still have to attend a meeting with the Decathlon team" I replied softly,

"Well, can't you skip today's meeting? I really miss going out with you, you've always been busy these weeks" He said softly, I could tell I brought him down.

"I know, and I am sorry. But it's really important that I attend today's meeting" I said with an apologetic voice that matches the look on my face.

There was a long pause before he sighed, and said, "You always say that."

"I know… I'm really sorry" I apologized whole-heartedly

"You say that a lot, too." He noted.

"What am I supposed to say? It's the truth. I really need to attend…" I trailed off,

"You know, Shar, it's starting to seem like all these you have to do; helping with the play, the decathlon meetings, and the music writing with Kelsi, are much more important than me. Can't you just sacrifice one day?" He paused, "I sacrificed for you. I had to skip 5 practices even if the Championships are close…" He finished.

"Can you sacrifice for me, Sharpay?" He asked again.

I couldn't move my lips, and I couldn't find the right words to say. I felt as if it has all been done, like I had no choice anymore, and that it's too late to change anything.

My silence gave him his answer. "I knew it." He said as he shook his head and walked away. I fought the urge to cry. I inhaled deeply and composed myself. I walked to the lab dully.

------

Practice was like every practice. We would do some experiments, then answer come complex mathematical equations.

"Sharpay, what is your answer in the second equation?" Taylor asked her,

"Um… x= 21." She answered,

"X=21? That's pretty far from what we calculated." Taylor said,

"I'm sorry. I'm just feeling buzzed." I lied.

"Oh, it's okay. Maybe you could work on some experiments?" She offered

"Sure" I said, but my foot hit Gabriella's chair, who was next mine, which caused me to trip, luckily, Gabriella and Taylor had caught me.

"I'm sorry." I said as I steadied myself and walked towards the table where the chemicals and equipments were

Gabriella and Taylor looked at each other then walked over to where I was. They sat on the chairs nearest to mine.

"Shar, is there something wrong?" Gabriella asked me,

I sighed; I know I couldn't lie to them, "No." I felt the tears forming in my eyes.

"Whoa- what happened?" Taylor asked me,

"I think me and Troy are gonna break up soon…" I started, but Taylor cut me off,

"What? Why? You were so happy a few days ago!" She cried,

"Would you let me finish?" I asked her,

She looked embarrassed, "Sorry. Go on" She urged

"Well, as I've said before, we might break up soon… if I don't stop doing what I'm doing to him" I finished,

"What are you doing to him?" Gabriella asked me,

I sighed and looked around the room… there are too many people who could overhear our conversation.

"Nothing," I finished. I knew they were about to hover, so I stood up with an experiment card in my hands, walked to the blackboard and wrote some details about the experiment I chose just in case some members were interested.

I discussed to the other members how the experiment works, and other agendas.

Taylor and Gabriella, on the other hand, discussed to the other members some mathematical equations.

We were, for a fact, the leaders of the Decathlon Team.

--

I sat in my room, staring up at the ceiling. I wondered how I'm gonna fix my problem with Troy, and if I should even try. I heard my phone ring, I checked to see who was calling, it was Troy.

"Troy?" I said when I picked it up.

"Sharpay?" I heard Tiara's voice on the other line. My heart sank. Why was Troy's phone with her?

"Tiara?" I asked in disbelief.

"Hey, look, Troy left his phone today, and I know you're with him, so do you mind giving it to him?" She asked in her sweet voice again.

I don't know if I should, or shouldn't. I just said the first thing that was in my mind. "Whatever."

"Okay. Um, I'll drop it off at your house?" she asked

"Yeah, sure" I replied.

"Ok. I'll see you in a bit." She said as she hung up.

--

After 15 minutes, Tiara arrived. I got Troy's phone and she left, she said goodbye, of course.

I looked at Troy's phone and flipped it open. I was very flattered to see that his wallpaper was a picture of me. I softened up. I walked up to my room with a smile.

When I arrived, I was ultimately shocked to see Troy there. He was lying on my bed. The balcony door was open. He must've used that to get in.

"Troy! What are you doing here?" I asked as I closed the door behind me before Ryan and my parents see him.

"I just wanted to drop by… (?)" He answered, although he sounded as if he wasn't sure what to answer.

"Oh. Well, Tiara dropped off your phone. She said you left it… somewhere." I said; I wasn't actually sure where Tiara found his phone, but I didn't really wanna find out.

"Probably in school, I went home the moment class ended." He said awkwardly.

"Hmm…" I replied.

There was a long pause before he spoke.

"Shar, can we talk?" Troy asked,

I felt nervous now. Was he gonna try to break up with me? Or is he gonna try to fix our relationship?

"We are talking now, aren't we?" I asked.

He chuckled a bit, but his face became serious. "No. As in, talk-talk." He said.

"Oh. Ok." I said.

"Sit with me, hon. I won't bite." He tried to joke, but it doesn't touch his eyes.

I sat beside him and waited for him to talk.

"I'm sorry for demanding so much of you earlier today. I know you, Gabriella, and Taylor have to really work hard for your scholarships… and it would be so mean of me to try to stop you from working for it…" He said with apologetic eyes.

"It's okay, Troy…" I started, but he silenced me by placing his finger on my lips.

"And I talked to Gabriella and Taylor just before I came here… They said that you said we are gonna break up soon if you keep on doing what you keep on doing to me… Shar, don't break us up. I don't mind you working hard on your education and… college, it's fine with me now, I was just being selfish… I promise, I will be supportive, just please don't break us up… I… I love you too much to give you away" He pleaded. I can see the intensity in his eyes. It made me feel weak.

"Troy… that isn't the problem; it's not you, it's me" I said.

He looked up at me with curiosity written all over his face.

"What do you mean?" He asked,

This is the time. I'm gonna tell him everything now.

"I've been feeling… bad, no…insecure." I admitted,

"Insecure? About?" He asked,

"Everything; You always keep telling me how perfect of a girlfriend I am, and I am trying to believe that, too, but the fact that I know someone who could do a lot better at it than I do makes me…think twice." I explained to him.

I looked at his expression; I saw disbelief and shock.

"And who would that girl be?" He asked,

"…Tiara…" I said through gritted teeth.

"Tiara?! Sharpay, sure, she's pretty, but I never actually thought of her that way." He said

"Not _yet_" I said.

"Sharpay, you're my girlfriend. Not her. I love _you_ and not her. I chose _you_ over her" He pointed out to me.

"I know that, and I'm glad… I'm just afraid that you might be regretting ever doing those… and I might be holding you back from what you really want…" I said

"You are what I want." He said with passion so evident in his voice.

"Troy, face it, I don't belong in your crowd. You are the Golden Boy of East High, and I'm not a golden anything."

"Are you trying to tell me that I'm not the one for you?" He asked with a glitch of disbelief and irritation in his voice.

"No. I'm not. All I'm trying to say is that _I'm _not the one for you"

He stood up, and covered his eyes with one hand. He took a deep breath. He always does this whenever he gets mad, frustrated, or anything in that category.

"Sharpay, It doesn't matter if you're not a golden anything. I'm not a golden anything either, I'm just a guy, a guy who is in love with a girl who is very beautiful and intelligent." He said as he walked closer to me and holds my hand.

I tried to hide my smile, but he saw it.

"And that smile, might be nothing for others, but for me, it's the most beautiful thing in the world." He said as he lifted my chin and gave me a soft kiss on the lips.

"I'm sorry, Troy. I've just been… a green-eyed monster lately." I apologized as he sat beside me on my bed.

He chuckled. "It's fine. I understand how you feel. I felt insecure, too." He admitted sheepishly.

"You? _The _Troy Bolton? Insecure? Oh! Tell me all the details!" I said with such excitement as I pushed him, which caused him to lay on his back, and rest my head on his tummy.

He put his hand on my tummy as well. "Well, there is a different world in the men's locker room, you know…" he started,

"Do tell." I said as I rubbed his hand,

"Well, it happened a few months ago. I was changing into my regular clothes after having basketball practice. A lot of guys were talking about you. Although, the funny part there was, the two guys totally flushed when Chad told them she was my girlfriend." Troy said,

I had to laugh about that.

"See. We both have nothing to worry about. I love you, you love me, it's all good. And Tiara could be everybody's dream girl, but not mine, I've got you." He said,

I smiled, "Okay. Thanks. But, that's enough. You're getting corny already" I teased, but I could tell the happiness was obvious in my face,

"True, but you seem to like it."

"I do." I said as I giggled and kissed his hand.

"I love you, Shar" He said softly,

"I love you, too." I replied.

We sat like that for quite a time. I checked the clock; it read 9:00pm.

"You should go. It's getting late and my parents, and even worse, my brother could come in any second, so I suggest you go before they see you." I said,

"Okay" He replied.

I walked him to my balcony door; I stopped at the doorway and leaned on the frame. He faced me and he laced our fingers together.

"Goodnight." I said,

"Goodnight." He replied.

He then swayed his head to the left. I giggled and gave him a kiss on the cheek, and as I did this, he kissed mine as well. I giggled again.

"I love you" I said,

"Right back at you, Hon" He said as he climbed down the tree in front of my balcony.

--

A few months had passed and everything went on perfectly. Me and Troy were closer than ever; the decathlon team won the competition, the wildcats won the championships against West High, and me and Tiara were actually friends. She would come over my house with Taylor and Gabriella and we would just do girl stuff together.

It was great. I finally had my happily ever after. And my insecurities meant nothing from the start.

**A/N: This is probably the longest one-shot I've ever written. But I had fun writing it so I hope you like it. BTW, I know the character in HSM3 is Tiara Gold. I changed it to Brown. I thought it was Brown, but I just found out it was Gold. I didn't want to change it. I'm not ashamed to hide my mistake. Anyhow, Please review! ******

**With Hearts,**

**LA2021~**


End file.
